Category: Event Planning

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Catering, Event Planning, Fun Story, funfair events, Funfair Rides

Dismaland A Theme Park With A Difference

24 February 2021

The world renowned graffiti artist, Banks’y happens to be a favourite of my daughters. To be honest I quite like his style too. A few years back when she was studying art at school, she made Banksy her special project, so one day we jumped in the car and drove to Bristol to visit his artworks in the flesh so to speak.

When he announced the Dismaland project, a theme park not suitable for kids as he put it, at an old Lido in Weston Super Mere. We were lucky enough to secure tickets for us and a couple of Emmerson’s friends.

My wife hates using our car due to the size and fuel consumption, but none of the vans would fit 5 people, so I got to enjoy a blast all the way down the country in my Mas. During the periods the wife fell asleep I got to enjoy the 400+ horses under the bonnet without screams of “Look at the fuel consumption” lol.

When we got to the park, the queue was enormous. It was then that I realised a possible problem. I had actually bought the tickets on ebay, not through a regular channel as they were next to impossible to obtain. Basically the ticket was a sheet of A4 paper with a barcode. Anyone could have put them together, or the same ticket could have been sold multiple times.

Crap, but I did have a cunning plan, I sent the kids in first to see what happened. In the event they walked straight in so we were ok.

A Park With A Difference

Now the park itself was different, very different, but something we all enjoyed. However I have to say it brought a worrying trend home. The whole idea was that the park was meant to be a dismal, unfriendly place, with surly staff that couldn’t be bothered with the customers. A spoof on a traditional fairground.

Thing I realised was, the customer service part was pretty much what you see on some fairgrounds today. Young kids in the stalls playing on their phones who viewed you as a nuisance if you wanted to play. Operators in the rides looking bored and disinterested. At one point the wife and I were stood debating whether we should go into a particular structure. When the girl on the outside shouted at us “In or out, in or out, don’t stand there blocking the ride, make your mind up!”

I burst out laughing, because a very good friend of mine has exactly the same customer facing skills. I have seen her shout very similar commands when some poor unfortunate is stood at the ride entrance making their mind up.

One of the many twisted rides
One of the many twisted rides

I was impressed by the thought that had gone into the attractions. To be sure they were taking traditional funfair attractions and twisting them into some steam punk, distressed interpretation of what they would have been. But in some cases hitting the nail right on the head.

It’s Impossible To Win!

Topple The Anvil With A Rubber Ball
Topple The Anvil With A Rubber Ball

Take topple the anvil for instance. I should imagine its physically impossible to knock an anvil off the shelf with a rubber ball. But then, there are games I have seen on fairgrounds that are equally impossible. The traditional coconut shie was renowned for having ‘duds’, that is some of the coconuts you were trying to knock off were actually metal replicas. Nothing short of an Exocet missile would move them.

Winning is strictly prohibited sign.
Not strictly true on a real fairgound but not far from the truth on some games.

One of my favourite shows was death riding the dodgem car. Played to trance music it was one of the earlier attractions we encountered and was just plain funny.

Death Dodgems
Death Dodgems

There was plenty of Banksy’s political commentary, such as the coin operated remote control boats. Which happened to be boats filled with refugees. Or the exhibition of various weapons used by governments to oppress the people.

Remote Controlled Refugee Boats
Remote Controlled Refugee Boats

There were also some weird commentary on consumerism and minority representation such as the gifts below sold in the shop.

Battlefield Casualty Action Man

Battlefield Casualty Action Man

But The Food Was Good

Lol, even the catering didn’t escape his vitriol.

Sign asking people to guess whats in their hot dog.
Lol, I can vouch ours contain pork

Although some people slated the park, I think it is because they just didn’t get the sarcasm mixed with social commentary undercurrent that it was put together with. We had a great time.

Sources;

Dismaland http://www.dismaland.co.uk

Banksy https://www.banksy.co.uk

Event Planning, Fun Story, funfair events, Funfair Rides

Some Common Funfair Questions

16 February 2021

One thing that the funfair industry is very poor at, is PR. Possibly because we tend to keep outsiders at arms length, many people have very little idea of how the industry works. Often we are regarded as gypsies (we are not, they are a totally separate ethnic/cultural group), there is this idea that funfairs just roll up willy nilly and set up on a piece of land they have no right to. That rides are thrown together by semi literate knuckle grabbing high school drop outs who have no idea what they are doing. So in an effort to spread a little fact, to counter some of the common fiction, we are going to answer some common funfair questions. If you have any others add them in the comment section and we will answer them for you.

1 Are Funfair Rides Safe?

This is the big one, and one that quite rightly you are entitled to ask. I will let the Health and Safety Executive provide the primary answer to this;

1.2 Risks to the public at fairs and amusement parks have proved to be quite small, on average, despite common perceptions to the contrary. For example, the risk of death from a typical session is estimated, on a pessimistic basis, at 1 in 83 million, which is:
a) about one twelfth that from a typical walk to get to the site;

Lets compare that 1 in 83 million figure.

Your risks of dying from the following pursuits;

  • Car Accident – 1 in 200
  • Train Crash – 1 in 65,000
  • Shark Attack – 1 in 3.7 million
  • Plane Crash – 1 in 7.6 million
  • Struck by Lightning – 1 in 14 million

So does this mean that the experience is totally risk free. Sadly not. Modern rides are high speed complex pieces of machinery subject to immense stress and high G forces. Modern computerised design and testing systems mean that much of the dangers have been designed out. However over time, metal corrodes and weakens, systems can fail. So how is this counteracted.

ADIPS

The ADIPS scheme requires a comprehensive safety test every year for each piece of equipment. This covers electrical and mechanical safety, as well as non destructive testing such as x-rays or dye penetration to check for cracks and metal fatigue. Rides are also required to have a daily check scheme in place which is recorded every day.

The weakest link, as always, are humans. Checks rely on the operator carrying them out and taking action on faults that are found. Most rides are operated by the families that own them, so the incentive to carry these out correctly is not only possible large fines and/or jail, but also the massive loss of income if they are closed down.

The Human Factor

The one factor we don’t have control over, are the actions of our customers, more humans. In my 50 years on the funfair I have only ever been at a fair once where someone was sadly killed. What happened was that a young man climbed over a 6ft high safety rail to go and push his friends on a ride called the swinging gyms. Basically a box containing 4 of his friends, you rock the box back and forth to gradually gain height and go over the top.

He ran to give them a push, tripped and landed on the bottom of the ride, as the box came down it crushed him. Totally tragic, and totally avoidable by the poor victim. But it is hard to see what more the operator could have been expected to do.

Swinging Gym funfair ride
Swinging Gym funfair ride

Similarly we regularly have arguments on rides with minimum height limits. Parents want their offspring to go on the ride but they are not tall enough. Enraged they demand that they are allowed on because the parent knows best and evidently wants to willingly put their little darlings at risk!

2 Do They Carry Insurance?

Yes, two types. The first covers the actual equipment for damage or loss from theft/fire/accident. A typical modern ride easily costs in the mid six figure bracket. A few examples are in the millions bracket, so it isn’t feasible to chance losing investments on this level.

The other is public liability insurance, covering the riders and members of public. Most rides have two policies, the first carries £1 million cover. We than pay into a trade organisation fund which adds an additional £10 million to this.

Most local authorities require a minimum of £5 million, so our industry is well in excess of what is required.

Insurance Policy
Insurance Policy

3 Do Fairgrounds Just Set Up Anywhere?

Another really popular misconception. We have set up in high streets in the past, only to have a local resident actually call the council to ‘make them aware’ that the high street is ‘under occupation’ by the fair folk.

At the minute (2021) things are still a little strange what with Covid and all. Normally, on January 1st, we could usually list the dates and locations of all our events for that year. Indeed some like Nottingham Goose Fair, have been operating for hundreds of years.

Look, a large funfair is a major logistical exercise. To move dozens of ultra large vehicles around the country to set up an event easily costs tens of thousands of pounds. Realistically, is anyone going to throw that kind of money about in the hope that when they set up the council and police will allow them to stay. An expensive mistake if they don’t.

Additionally the event needs to be advertised, additional logistics like filling generator fuel tanks, or providing a suitable locations for the living quarters all need to be arranged.

Take a look at the picture below, there is no way something like that can just be randomly thrown together, that is planned months in advance.

Newcastle Hoppings Funfair
Newcastle Hoppings Funfair

4 Why Are Fairground Workers Covered In Tattoos And Have No Teeth?

Lol, I just love some of the funfair questions we are subject to. The funfair community is an incredibly close knit one. Most of us either know each other, or at the very least are only a couple of steps away from knowing each other.

I know of only one ‘funfair operator’ who has tattoos. A really nice lad, he wasn’t actually brought up on the fairground but married into it. That’s it. Tattoos just aren’t considered a socially acceptable thing within the industry.

‘Ah’, I hear you cry, Mark off the waltzers who I was snogging has them. Well, yep, Mark probably does. Thing is, Mark is a local lad that has been employed casually to help out at your local fair. Next week he will go back to being unemployed Mark.

We don’t have a particular problem with the practise, it’s just not one we engage with as a rule.

A noted exception has to be mentioned though, a few generations ago, when times were particularly hard, one lady struggling to feed her kids, actually had her entire body, sans her neck face and hands, tattooed. She went on to appear as the main exhibit in her own sideshow.

Artoria Gibbons
Artoria Gibbons

The pain must have been incredible, they were a hardy breed back then.

Regarding the teeth thing, we actually do visit dentists, and I can’t honestly say that funfair dentition is any different to non funfair dentition.

5 Do You Have Things Like Running Water And Electricity?

Out of the many funfair questions we get asked, these ones really do bug us. No we eat cold food, don’t wash and go to bed when it gets dark. Or at least some seem to believe so. Pictured below is the interior of a modern caravan. Fully furnished and connected to electricity, gas and running water. Oh, and flushing toilets, probably the same make as in your house.

Gas, it probably slightly different as we tend to use bottled gas or LPG, rather than a fixed connection, which tends to be difficult with all the moving about and such.

Storage space tends to be built into sofa’s and various nooks and crannys as well as the cupboards and wardrobes. The end result is quite often more room and storage available than a typical modern house. Most caravan’s have entire sections that slide out to make the actual home much bigger than it is when being transported by road.

I remember a few years back in Holland, actually seeing a double deck caravan, IE it had a top floor, though that doesn’t seemed to have made it to these shores yet.

Caravan Interior
Caravan Interior

If there are any others you know of leave a comment and we will add to the answers.

Event Planning, Fun Story, funfair events, Funfair Rides, General

Future 4 Fairgrounds

8 February 2021

The equality for women movement has existed for a long time in this country. Logically there isn’t a viable argument to be made for not treating them as equal. OK, there are some niche items, usually involving brute strength where an average man is stronger than an average woman, but I can’t really think of much else.

On the fairground however, things are very different. Women have pretty much been the equal of their men folk, well, forever. Heck, who am I kidding, most of the time they are leading from the front. It’s one of the few industries where the business is usually a genuinely equal partnership between the sexes.

Global Pandemic

As you will see, his was illustrated perfectly when the Covid-19 crisis struck.

Funfairs, like much of the entertainment industry was closed down, and received little in the way of government support.

A few showmen managed to provide some local funfairs, but in many cases, even though the government gave the go ahead for this, the local authorities refused to play ball and promptly closed them down.

True to form, the showmen (and women ) immediately pivoted into a myriad of other lines of work. From delivering parcels to baking cakes to making garden furniture, they needed to feed their families and so just got stuck in.

Showmen’s Guild

Our trade organisation the ‘Guild’ as it is popularly known, has come in for a lot of flak during this time. It is commonly felt that they have neither done enough, nor been seen to be doing enough.

For the former, it’s a debatable point. I am sure that plenty has been going on behind the scenes. However they haven’t done a very good job of communicating this to the members.

When it comes to pushing our case to the wider world, it has to be said that our industry hasn’t been particularly visible either in the traditional media, or just as importantly, on social media.

Step Forward The Ladies

In an attempt to remedy this, a group of ladies from within the industry have decided to step up and take the matter into their own hands. Forming a campaign group known as “Future 4 Fairgrounds”, they have began a PR campaign to try and focus a spotlight upon the plight of our industry.

Future 4 Fairgrounds Logo
Future 4 Fairgrounds

They have made excellent use of social media, which, in this day and age is just as important as the traditional media outlets. From regular Facebook posts, to some professionally produced videos on Youtube, there has been a marked increase in our industries online presence.

Coupled with this have been regular appearances of the F4F banners, at various events around the country. Many street fairs have been cancelled due to the crises. At a few, a token children’s rides have attended to maintain the link to the fairs charter. Quite often the ride has proudly sported a banner publicising our plight to the public.

A range of car stickers were also produced and have turned up in some surprising places.

Facebook

Their campaign has been a brilliant addition to publicising our industries plight. The Facebook page at Future4Fairgrounds is fast becoming a valuable resource. Showing just what is happening around the country regarding the funfair industry. The ladies appear to be building some valuable links with M.P.’s and other influential organisations.

Like many traditional industries, ours is going to look very different coming out of the crisis. It’s arguable how much longer we can deal with being totally closed without any help. A lot of showmen may well never get started back up.

Initiatives like the F4F group are going to be more important than ever as we enter the second year of Covid. So good luck ladies, and keep flying high.

Event Planning, Fun Story, Funfair Rides

The 14 Best Ferris Wheels, The Iconic Funfair Ride

23 January 2021

Few of the funfair rides you see today are as iconic as Ferris Wheels, or Big Wheels as they are also known.

Taking its name from the wheel built for the World’s Columbian Exposition in Chicago, 1893 by George Washington Gale Ferris. Though William Somers installed three fifty foot wooden wheels in 1892 so perhaps they should be called Somers Wheels.

Then again Pietro Della Valle, a Roman traveller wrote of riding a Great Wheel in Constantinople in 1615, so should they be Constantinople wheels or Della Valle Wheels?

Whoever deserves the naming rights, it was George that actually ended up adding his name to one the enduring legacies of the funfair industry.

Lets take a look at some of the weird and wonderful wheels around the world.

The Original Ferris Wheel

The Original 'Ferris Wheel' The grandaddy that gave its name to all the others.
The Original ‘Ferris Wheel’ The grandaddy that gave its name to all the others.

The original ‘Ferris’ wheel pictured here was 80.4 metres high, 264ft if you are sticking to olde measures, not sure how many cubits that is if you are even older than Imperial measurements. It was intended to rival the Eiffel Tower which had formed the centre piece of the Paris Exposition. The axle weighing 71 tonne was the world’s largest forging at that time, and the ride had a carrying capacity of 2160 people, unrivalled today Indeed the world’s biggest wheel the Vegas High Roller managing a little over half that.

The Vegas High Roller

Currently The World's Highest Wheel, The Vegas High Roller
Currently The World’s Highest Wheel, The Vegas High Roller

Currently the world’s highest wheel is the Vegas High Roller. At 550ft (158.5 metres, 366.67 cubits) high, this beats the Singapore Flyer by a scant 9ft. Rotating on two custom designed spherical bearings each weighing just under 9 tonnes. The passenger cabins are electrically rotated to maintain a smooth level ride and each weighs 20 tonnes. A wheel currently being built in Dubai should claim the crown as world’s tallest wheel if it ever opens, currently construction is 5 years behind schedule.

The Vienna Riesenrad

The Vienna Riesenrad, The world's oldest operating Ferris wheel.
The Vienna Riesenrad, The world’s oldest operating wheel.

Located inside the Vienna Prater (the world’s oldest amusement park), the Riesenrad was constructed in 1897. This has unique old fashioned cabins, one of which can be hired complete with dining and a champagne meal.

It was designed by Harry Hitchins and Hubert Cecil Booth, a pair of British engineers, and constructed by Lieutenant Walter Bassett Bassett an English engineer. to celebrate the Golden Jubilee of Emperor Franz Josef I. At 212ft high it is nowhere near the ‘big’ wheels out there, but it adds a touch of class all its own.

The Tianjin Eye Observation Wheel

The Tianjin Eye.
The Tianjin Eye, CC BY-SA 2.0

Also called the Tientsin Eye, this is a mid height wheel at 394ft, what makes it unusual, is that it is the only major wheel actually built on a bridge, in this case the Yongle Bridge, over the Hai River in Tianjin China.

The Osaka Wheel

The Osaka Ferris Wheel
The Osaka Wheel

This is an oddball in the wheel world. Rather than being round it is an oval shape. The main structure doesn’t move rather the cars move around a track.

The Big O

The Big O Wheel
The Big O Wheel

Situated in the Tokyo Dome City, Japan. This is not only the world’s largest centreless wheel at 200ft high (it has an actual roller coaster built through the middle), it also has a number of cars with karaoke machines fitted. We are not actually convinced that being stuck on a ride for 30 minutes with someone singing badly is a great move.

Baseball Ferris Wheels

The Baseball Wheel
The Baseball Wheel

Not particularly large, but certainly novel. Built in Comerica park, downtown Detroit. The location of the Detroit Tigers Major League Baseball Team.

The Waggon Wheel

The Waggon Wheel
The Waggon Wheel

No, not a biscuit, though legend has it that the biscuit was a similar size before inflation kicked in. This is located in Flamingo Land Amusement park here in the UK. Themed around the iconic plains wagons of old America. YeeeHaaa

The Golden Reel Figure 8

The Golden Reel Figure 8 Wheel
The Golden Reel Figure 8 Wheel

Located in Macau, this is one of the highest wheels in the world. Not due solely to its size, but to the fact that it is actually built to join two hotels together. You board on the 23rd floor, and what makes it even more unique is that fact that it is a figure 8 wheel, having 2 loops does that make it Ferris Wheels?

Royal Tyres Wheel

The Royal Tyres Ferris Wheel
The Royal Tyres Ferris Wheel

The Uniroyal giant tyre wheel created for the 1964 New York World’s Fair. Now located in Michigan this 80ft high wheel was designed by the same firm responsible for the Empire State Building, Shreve, Lamb & Harmon. Driven by a 100hp engine the wheel carries 96 passengers.

John Kormeling Wheel

Drive In Ferris Wheels
Drive In Ferris Wheel

Created by the artist John Kormeling, this is one wacky wheel. Instead of gondolas for the passengers, it has flat structures that you actually park you car on, yes, you don’t even have to leave your car to ride this wheel.

The Priyat Big Wheel

The Priyat Wheel

This wheel isn’t particularly tall, or have any unusual features. Oh, except for being quite close to a major nuclear disaster. The wheel is virtually brand new having hardly been used before Chernobyl went tits up. It isn’t one we would recommend visiting, although there are actually companies now running tours to the area around Chernobyl.

Eccentric Wheel

An Eccentric Wheel
An Eccentric Wheel

These are an uncommon version of the wheel. Instead of the cars being suspended on axles at the ends of the arms, they travel on a track that zig zags inside the main structure, so they slide towards the centre of the wheel then away from it. There was one built in 1920 at Coney Island, and another at one of the Disney parks.

Underground Ferris Wheels

Underground Ferris Wheels
Underground Ferris Wheel

A mere 65ft high and only 6 cars would make this a pretty poor example for Ferris Wheels. Until you consider it is actually underground inside a giant salt mine. Located in Turda, Romania, the mine dates back to the 13th century and is 368ft beneath below ground. I guess that technically makes this the world’s lowest wheel!

Catering, Event Planning, Fun Story

Street Food Carts For Your Event

20 January 2021
Street Food Cart Small

We have had the same range of carts for quite a period now for everything from street food carts to weddings. Heck, we average over 500 events a year, so obviously they are popular. Why change when it works?

Thing is during the lockdown, we have had that rare luxury, time. We began looking at many of our competitors, and realised that they are doing things we are not. What is more galling is the knowledge that at one time, we would have been doing them first.

Because of this we have designed and produced a range of removable panels that totally alter the styling of many of our ranges of carts and bar sections.

No1 daughter has also been pestering for us to add a more quirky street food type of catering unit.

To this end we eventually did just that, it was for a series of outdoor events, where we were serving 450 jacket potatoes a day, and we felt that the extra room this design allowed us would make it easier to operate.

Street Food Cart Small
Street Food Cart Small

Basic Street Food Option

Our first design is a bare bones, patterned plywood unit, meant to look slightly third worldy for a quirky feel.

It was used successfully for a number of the aforementioned jacket potato jobs, as well as doughnuts and hot dogs.

Sticking with the theme, the menu boards and clip art was all held on with mini cloths pegs, and the top sign stencilled with our favourite Sex Pistols font.

Red Ribbed Streetfood Stalls
Red Ribbed Streetfood Stalls

Red Ribbed Stall

Our next version was made using deep red corrugated panels, this gave a more industrial feel and was used for a number of Hot Chocolate/Hot Dog days at local schools.

Either unit can be used for any of our range of catering options. Indeed it is plenty roomy to add two or three offerings in the same stall.

Over the coming year we intend adding a number of additional options to our street food carts. So keep checking back. Or keep checking our website for more details of street food units.

Event Planning, funfair events, Funfair Rides

Yoyo set up, Tales Of Misadventures

16 January 2021

Thankfully this isn’t one of our tales. The guy involved does contract work for us quite often, and is a good operator, I think here he was just unlucky. Twice.

He was attending a funfair in Ireland with his freakout ride. A bang up to date modern thrill ride, that is both high and fast. Imaging a giant arm with seats attached swinging in a massive arc up into the sky, back down then repeating in the opposite direction.

Well, turns out that the fair he was attending, was already in operation, so he had to pull in and set up in the early hours of the morning. Which, he duly did. Unfortunately it turns out he miscalculated his footprint in the dark, and realised the next morning, in the gloom of daylight, that if he set said ride in operation, it would wrap itself around a tree. Things that collide with trees tend to come off second best.

Due to health and safety restrictions he couldn’t take it back down during the operating hours of the fair, so cue another through the night operation to derig it, move it and set it back up.

Truck Collides With Tree
Truck Collides With Tree

Attempt Number 2

He duly managed this with a little time to spare before daylight. Adhering to the old adage of measuring twice and cutting once, he had triple checked the swing and was absolutely sure it would miss the tree.

So, come opening hour all was good. Only sadly it wasn’t. Just as he was about to set the first ride off, another operator come running up in a panic, to point out that if his ride (the other operator) and the star of our tale were both to set their respective rides going. It would result in a massive collision of two high speed rides.

Health and safety meant that they couldn’t operate alternately, as the risk of inadvertently setting them both of together was just too great. And once again, he couldn’t derig during the operation of the fair. So our intrepid hero had to sit his second day out.

Attempt Number 3

Our hero, undaunted, worked tirelessly through the night to derig and once again set up. This time away from trees, other operators rides and anything else he could think of.

So as day three dawned he thankfully prepared to at last earn some money.

Sadly, due to rising Covid-19 rates in the area, the council chose that day to close the full event down. And then cancel it. So despite three attempts at setting up, he sadly ended up poorer, but wiser.

Catering, Event Planning, funfair events

6 Top Gourmet Hot Dogs

27 December 2020

We upgraded our hot dog service from regular (boring) ole weiners, to rip roaring gourmet hot dogs. With a range of fun, quirky and delicious toppings. Settling on our final ‘Standard’ menu, we went through a number of trial dogs. Some of our favourites are listed here. Some made the cut some didn’t but all are available on request for your event.

Tex-Mex Dog

Tex-Mex gourmet hot dog
Tex-Mex Gourmet Dog

Start with a standard frankfurter. Add a layer of nacho cheese sauce, red jalapeno peppers, sliced of course, and garnished with onions and nachos. Big enough to fill a Texican, well some of them.

Chilli Dog

Chilli Dog
Chilli Dog

An old favourite this one, a broiled frank, slathered in quality beef chilli, topped with red peppers and garnished with grated cheese.

The John Wayne

The John Wayne, Gourmet cowboy hot dog
The John Wayne

Named after our favourite cowboy, well, there are one or two in the fairground industry we like, but you probably won’t know them. A broiled weiner chopped into sections, slathered in baked beans, garnished with peppers, then finished with your choice of condiments.

Dutch Dog

Dutch Dog, Gourmet Hot Dog
Dutch Dog

From the land of windmills, clogs, very tall people and erm, slightly dodgy brownies. Ie Holland, or the Netherlands home of the Dutch. Gee it must be awfully cramped over there with 3 lots all living in the same place. This one is a regular frankfurter. Dressed with a mixture of peppers and chopped onions, marinated in mayonnaise. Garnished with poffertjes, those little tiny Dutch pancakes to finish.

The Samurai

The Samurai

From the land of the rising sun, samurais and cooking that can kill you like the puffer fish. Take a frankfurter, place it on a bed of sushi, which contrary to popular belief, isn’t raw fish, its actually vinegar pickled rice. Add a few slices of fish, and garnish with wasabi and soy sauce.

The Floss Dog

The Floss Dog
The floss dog

Personally I wanted to call this the vomit dog, but I was voted down as it turns out some people actually like it, weirdo’s! One of our finest frankfurters, placed on a bed of bloody candy floss, drizzled with chocolate sauce, I mean chocolate on a hot dog. Then topped with sugar sprinkles. Makes you wanna throw up.

Anyway we have loads of new ideas, so gourmet hot dogs is definitely something we will be expanding in the future.

If you fancy hot dog cart hire without the floss version get in touch.

Event Planning, Fun Story, funfair events, Funfair Rides

Nutcases, Organising Funfair Events & Killer Swans

2 December 2020

Originally we were traditional funfair operators. We then started to make the move into organising funfair events. Eventually we reached the point where we decided to specialise purely in corporate and private events. The sort where we don’t charge the guests, the person booking us pays a fixed rate.

But in between the two extremes, we had a period, where we were taking on paid work and traditional festivals, fetes, galas, in fact we would try anything.

Over time we found that only a small percentage of events ended up financially viable, but it was a steep learning curve. Two events in particular stand out from this period.

Peterborough Showground

We were contacted by a gentleman who was putting together a huge event (his words) at Peterborough Showground. This was to raise money for charity, he was expecting in excess of 50,000 people to attend, and the night would be highlighted by a set played by One Direction, fresh from winning whatever reality show they had won.

Arthur and I travelled to meet him. He had the spiel, and he ticked the boxes showing us the contract already signed for One Direction, so it looked pretty good. In hindsight, (that most wonderfully useless of skills) we should have been a teeny bit suspicious of his qualifications to run an event of this scale, when we had to help him jump start his 30 year old clapped out Fiat Panda, because it wouldn’t start. But hey, he might have been one of those eccentric promoters. We have in fairness dealt with multi millionaires before, who looked like a close relation to Greengrass of Heartbeat fame.

We sorted a deal out, and agreed to organise a funfair event on a grand scale, thrill rides, family rides, games stalls, catering, the kitchen sink and all.

The Big Day

I was at another event on the big day. So Arthur, my part time partner in crime was going to be in charge. We had attracted a number of other operators with our enthusiastic selling of the event, so we did have a big selection of equipment set up.

On the morning I received two phone calls. The first was from a mate Graham. He wanted to thank me for letting him attend the festival. As he had this theory you see, that the more portable toilets at an event, the bigger the crowd was going to be. He told me that the toilets were lined up as far as the eye could see, he was already planning his retirement to a Caribbean island based on what he was going to earn.

The Second Call

The second call came from Arthur and was rather more panicked. When I had calmed him down enough to talk rationally he came out with a classic line. “Do you know how many tickets he has sold for this event?”

In fairness I had no idea, I was hoping for something like 40,000 but I thought that really anything over 20,000 would be a major event.

“427”, was Arthur’s now icily calm statement.

“Shit, 427 thousand, the venue won’t take that many people, health and safety will shut us down.” Now I was starting to panic.

“No”, said Arthur, “Not 427 FU***NG thousand, FOUR HUNDRED AND TWENTY SEVEN, as in three digits, as in we are in trouble. He thinks that lots of people will just turn up on the day and pay at the gate”

Well, at least I wasn’t there, so Arthur would have to deal with everyone. Graham didn’t talk to me for quite a while after that. I think they ended up with an attendance of about 800.

The moral of the story is never trust a guy in a broken down Fiat Panda.

Living in a ghost town
This Is How Peterborough Felt

Ripon Racecourse

The second, followed a similar pattern. A guy called Simon was putting an event on at Ripon racecourse. Rennie, another part time collaborator, and I went to meet him. He laid out the plans, the army was coming, the navy, airforce, a massive classic car show, giant car boot. Not as impressive as Peterborough, but a nice sized localish event. We agreed terms and shook hands.

Now the night before we were due to set up, I attended an event in Glossop with a couple of children’s rides. One of them which was trailer mounted, had a wheel bearing collapse, and being a Saturday afternoon in a small town, I couldn’t source a replacement.

After the event, the AA refused to recover the trailer and instead got me a quote of £700 to take it the 40 miles back home. Bugger that, I ended up adjusting the towbar to take the weight off the back of the ride, and came home on three wheels. The last leg coming through the centre of Barnsley, I passed more bloody Police cars than I have ever seen, but thankfully whatever was going off kept them too preoccupied to notice my DIY three wheeler.

I arrive At Ripon

Because of the hassles at Glossop, I ended up getting home in the early hours of the morning. Because both Arthur and Rennie were going to be at Ripon, I decided to let them sort the layout of the event out and I would turn up later to set my equipment up.

By the time I arrived at Ripon, it was raining lightly. I rounded the corner and pulled into a field, containing a fair bit of funfair equipment and nothing else. No Army, Navy or Air Force, no car show or giant car boot. WTF

As I jumped out of my lorry, that nutcase Simon ran up, with no shirt on singing ‘Three wheels on my wagon’. I looked at Arthur who smiled, he felt he still owed me for Peterborough. “You’ll have to explain to everyone why there is nothing here and no bloody people this time.” says he.

Oh Lord, “Where is everything Simon, I enquired politely though gritted teeth.”

“Not sure he beamed, thought it would be here by now, but don’t worry.”

“why don’t worry what have you got up your sleeve?” I hopefully asked.

“Well nothing really, but it’s great to be alive. God loves us”, he was still beaming.

It was at that point I decided to move him nearer to God. Thankfully, for him, Rennie and Arthur grabbed an arm each and kept me rooted to the spot, Simon, oblivious to his rapidly shortening life expectancy trotted off to his refrain of singing in the rain.

Killer Swans

When I had calmed down enough for them to let me loose. I looked at them and asked what we were going to do. “Your in charge” said Arthur, “Up to you this time”. He had a matching grin to Simons.

Just at that precise moment, karma decided to intervene. Ripon has a population of swans in its lake. Now most of them stayed away from us all in the lake. But one swan, a bit more adventurous than the rest had decided to come check us out. We were stood there, a bit like the three stooges, when the said swan decided to attack. Well, to be more precise, he left Rennie and I alone, and set about Arthur.

Ha, he wasn’t laughing now, and I hadn’t realised just how big and aggressive swans could be. Arthur ended up running away. But for the rest of the day, whenever he stopped in one place too long, the swan would swoop in and attack. Funny, it never bothered anyone else, well except for the young lady who had just bought a chocolate bun from the coffee stall, she had unwrapped it and was staring at it longingly, when a head on a long white neck, came from over her shoulder and snatched it.

Arthur's Mate. An angry swan
Arthur’s Mate

At Ripon we had only taken smaller attractions, so we just about covered our expenses.

We had a far more serious problem at another event Called The Great Yorkshire Carnival, but I am saving that for a future post.

If you would like to hire dodgems, games or any other attractions we can do that.

Event Planning, Fun Story, funfair events, Funfair Rides

Educated Idiots. Health And Safety Fails

24 November 2020

As any responsible operator, we pay great attention to health and safety requirements. With regular testing required for funfair attractions and daily inspections whenever they are operated, our industry has one of the best safety records in the country. We also throw in additional testing beyond what is required by the H&SE.

Many people regard the HSE as an extension of the nanny state, a sort of legitimised semi Gestapo type organisation tasked with interfering. Having seen the shortcuts some of the cowboys take. I don’t think you can argue against needing a formalised organisation to make sure the rules are applied.

Unfortunately, like many times in life, the inspectors demonstrate that no matter how highly educated or trained they are, some of them are what can charitably be described as idiots.

Newcastle Hoppings

In the days when we still used to operate at public events. We used to attend the ‘Hoppings’, Europe’s largest travelling funfair at Newcastle Upon Tyne. We were there one year and I was controlling a flying chairs ride. You know the type, the kids sit in a suspended chair, and as the ride rotates, the chairs fly out.

Now, the safety guidelines required a lap belt. Which is what we had, but I was always worried that smaller kids could slip under this belt. So we fitted additional straps that came between their legs and attached to the lap belt to make a 3 point harness. This wasn’t a legal requirement, it was an extra we added.

Now, we only used this extra strap on smaller kids, as obviously it took extra time to fit when you were busy. One day a strap had worked loose. So I removed it, and only used that seat for bigger kids. We had 20 in all so this wasn’t hard to arrange.

An Inspector Calls

Anyway an inspector from HSE, pulled me to one side and told me she wasn’t happy with that strap missing. I explained to her that it was an extra, and that if she looked most kids weren’t using them. And I would only put large kids on etc etc etc, well you get the idea.

Her rather snotty reply was that she would shut the ride down if it was not reattached, as if they were fitted then all of the seats should have them. I thought for a moment and then asked, “If I remove the other 19 so none of them have them would that be OK?”

“Yes” was the reply. Hmmn so rather than have 19 seats with additional safety, she was now telling me she preferred none of them to have it. In the end I went and found a screwdriver and reattached it.

Flying Chairs Ride For Hire
Flying Chairs Ride For Hire

An Inspector Calls Again

Not 2 days later the same bloody woman was back. Now, there is a large book full of guidance for funfair ride design. One of the recommendations (note the word recommended), is that rides have a maximum of 3 entrances. On our chairs ride, we had 4 small gates, 2 to allow entry, 2 to allow exit. When not in use they were closed, so technically we only had 2 open at any time.

This genius came up and kicked off about there being 4. For some reason her grasp of the English language wasn’t good enough for her to understand that 3 was recommended, but not a legal requirement. I found that trying to reason with this idiot wasn’t working. In a fit of temper I grasped a large section of the safety rail surrounding the ride. Then threw it up the fair. Technically this left me with 2 small gates, and a large 20ft gap in the fence.

“1,2,3” I counted, “3 entrances, does that satisfy you?”

“Yes” was the FU***NG idiots reply. SO instead of 4 safe controlled gates, we now had a gap a whole herd of kids could run through into a fast moving ride.

After bringing my blood pressure under control, I calmly retrieved my section of fence, refitted it. Told the woman to go forth and multiply, and either fetch the Police to me. Or someone from her organisation who was in charge of the communal brain cells that day.

PC Plod

To give her, her due, she did what I asked and fetched the Police. I explained all that had transpired. To give him his due, he told her to go forth and multiply as well.

Columbo
Not The Actual Officer But You Get The Idea

The moral of the story is, give someone a smattering of power and they will look very hard for reasons to abuse it. Power corrupts, and absolute power is even more fun. They are indeed what a friend of mine refers to as educated idiots, in that they possess a degree or two, but no actual sense.

Catering, Event Planning, funfair events

The 5 Best Quirky Desserts For Your Wedding

21 November 2020
Hire Hot Fresh Doughnuts Cart

Over time the trend at weddings has been towards more quirky fun times. The food at a wedding is definitely one of the things people remember. A dessert is literally the icing on the cake. Here are the 5 best quirky desserts for your wedding.

Spanish Churros

The Spanish take on doughnuts. No holes in these, just long fluted fingers of crispy doughy goodness. Traditionally served with a thick hot chocolate, they are becoming more popular over here, with many people having first experienced them on Iberian holidays.

In addition to the standard Churros, we also provide an alcoholic version especially for weddings and events, but definitely not for kids.

Churros With Chocolate
Churros With Chocolate

Dutch Poffertjes

Little pieces of fluffy Dutch goodness. Poffertjes are mini Dutch pancakes, about the size of a 50p piece. They are not that well known over here, but are gradually gaining traction. The events we have attended with them, they have always gone down a treat. Traditionally coated in melted butter and sprinkles with sugar.

Poffertjes Plaat For Hire
Poffertjes Plaat For Hire

French Crepes

A better known dessert the crepe, is like a pancake, only much thinner. It is said that a crepe should be thin enough to read a love letter through. Watching a crepe being made is entertainment in itself. Being expertly twirled into a circle, then flipped over to bake both sides. Available with a selection of fruit and sauce toppings, with Nutella a firm favourite.

French Crepe Carts For Hire
French Crepe Carts For Hire

Belgian Waffles

The country that gave us Brussels Sprouts, (though we think they are the work of the devil), also gave us the fabulous waffle. A similar mixture to crepes, only much thicker, the waffle can be made in various shapes depending on the waffle plates being used. Another dessert that lends itself to Nutella.

Belgian Waffles Carts For Hire
Belgian Waffles Carts For Hire

Mini Doughnuts

Not a continental dessert this one, but still one of our favourites, mini doughnuts sprinkled in sugar with a selection of sauces and toppings.

doughnuts
doughnuts

Whatever type of wedding or party you are planning these are definitely The 5 Best Quirky Desserts For Your Wedding

Check out our other desserts.