Jarm69, Author at Crazy & Co.

Coronavirus, Problems Brings Opportunity.

8 March 2020

Coronavirus, another Chinese import. They say that every cloud has a silver lining. Well, its hard at the minute to see just where the Corvid-19 virus is going to present any advantages. There is talk of cancelling outdoor events throughout the country. This will devastate not only the funfair industry but also large parts of the outdoor events industry.

The virus itself is undoubtedly liable to kill large numbers of people. The NHS and other public services are predicted to be overwhelmed. The economy is going to talk a major hit.

Now we have the great British prats, opps, sorry, public panic buying things like toilet roll. WTF, as far as any of the reports suggest, the virus doesn’t give you diarrhea. So why the hell is everyone buying massive amounts of toilet paper?

Opportunities

Nevertheless, in the spirit of free enterprise, there are people taking advantage of the opportunities offered.

On the fairground, and seaside amusement arcades, the crane or ‘grabber machines’ have long been favourites. Basically, you have control of a 3 pronged grabber that you maneuver around the machine full of soft toys, then when you think its lined up you press the button. The grabber drops, grabs at the toys and hopefully manages to snag one for you. If you are lucky it carries the toy to the exit slot and drops it out to you.

In reality it tends to grab the toy and then drop it, the reason being the electromagnet controlling the grabber is set to be too weak to hold the weight of the toy. After the machine has taken a certain amount of money, it turns the magnet on full power and you will have a winner.

Toilet Rolls

With the panic buying of bog rolls, a number of enterprising operators have removed the soft toys from the machines and fill them with, yes, toilet rolls.

Who would have thought that one of the consequences of a worldwide coronavirus pandemic would be a shortage of toilet rolls.

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Fun Story

Royal Security, Not!

19 February 2020

There is a bit of an argument brewing about whether Prince Harry and Meghan should have publicly funded security provided. Well I dont want to argue the ins and outs of whether they deserve public money or not, but to be honest we have been involved with 3 events and found the security to be spectacular. Spectacularly bad that is.

Eton College Boating Lake

The first incident was a few years back when we provided a small children’s funfair in conjunction with the world rowing championships at Eton colleges boating lake in Dorney Park

Now the days the Royals were there, security consisted of seven rings. Radiating from the central point where royalty were sitting. You had to have appropriate passes to enter any particular ring. Being situated in the outer ring we had only level 1 passes.

One day, just after carrying out the daily checks, and a bit of maintenance on one of the rides, I went to the public toilets. These just happened to be near the gate for the next ring of security. I had a pair of overalls on to keep my cloths clean as I had been lubricating some moving parts. As I neared the entrance to level 2, the guy staffing the entrance, opened it to let me through.

Hmm, I wonder how far I could go. I actually walked through the first 5 levels, into level 6 before I chickened out. It was quite a lucrative contract, so I didn’t really want to lose it, but it opened my eyes, all you need to beat security like that is a pair of dirty overalls.

Princess Anne’s Helicopter

The second incident came when we again provided a small children’s funfair to the National Farmers Union Insurance company. They were opening their headquarters after a major refurbishment.

Now, we couldn’t set up until Princess Anne had taken off in her helicopter. Unfortunately she was running late, and I was panicking about being ready in time. I came up to the aircraft in question, and asked the security detail if I could fetch one of my cars up to unload it nearby, it would save me 5 minutes is all, but time was going to be tight.

The guys in the suits and ray bans had a quick conflab, then told me I was ok. I duly drove the car up, opened the boot, and discovered to my horror that my wife had stacked all the rifles off the shooting gallery in the back of the car, I smiled sickly as I slowly closed the boot, and told them it was ok, I would wait. Luckily they didn’t notice what was in there.

Agreed they were only air rifles, but they could have been actual assault rifles, and I could easily have shot the security staff then went looking for the Princess Royal.

Prince William And The Royal Birth

My favourite was during William and Kate’s last child being born. We had been contracted by Ladbrokes, the betting group to go down to the hospital where Kate was in labour. We were to give out tea and coffee to the paparazzi. Then when the baby was born, dispense copious amounts of Prosecco.

The brief from the client was that they didn’t have permission, and if the police objected we were just to leave, but they would still pay us.

When we turned up, the police were walking around with machine guns, yikes. I jumped out of the van, told the nearest copper what we were doing and that his guys/ladies and he could have tea and coffee whenever they wanted. He gave the thumbs up and we set up. Thing is, no one asked who gave us permission. Or even looked in our van to see if we had anything nasty in there.

It got even better. After the actual birth, we used our prosecco up, the client thanked us and told us we were free to pack up and go. Now, what we didn’t know was that the police had prevented any traffic moving in the vicinity of the hospital, as prince Williams motorcade was on its way in from Buckingham Palace.

Only, we were inside the cordon. We packed up jumped in the van and set off, straight around the corner and ran slap bang into the motorcade. Unfortunately our side of the road had a row of security fencing up so we couldn’t move over. As a result Prince William and all the following security vehicles had to drive up onto the pavement to squeeze past us. We were about 2 foot from the Prince, and could see his quizzical looks. We could also see the security officers and police in the following vehicles having apoplexy. Royal security not.

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Catering, Event Planning, Fun Story

Cannabis Candy Floss, A New High

16 February 2020

Long one of our most popular desserts. A Californian (where else) company is taking it to new heights with cannabis candy floss.

Candy floss is now available from them laced with THC, or to give it the correct name Tetrahydrocannabinol .

For those who don’t know, this just happens to be the ‘active’ ingredient in cannabis. The bit that gives you the high.

The new floss, comes with a full 100mg of active ingredient present. Enough to give a new meaning to the phrase party snack.

Now, we aren’t going to argue the morality or otherwise of such a product. TBH we very much doubt its going to appear in the UK.

A few years ago the medical establishment was experimenting with using candy floss to deliver drugs to kids. Laughing at the time we wondered how long it would be before someone launched floss with recreational drugs.

Perhaps our new range of alcohol flavoured candy floss might be more palatable. Especially considering they are flavoured but don’t actually contain any active alcohol. We are launching with Brandy, Whisky and Gin, but if the reception is good enough will be expanding it over the summer season.

It makes you wonder though what cannabis can be added to next, there is likely to be a steady stream of food and drink coming this way.

Sadly we aren’t yet allowed to offer cannabis floss, but if you would like to hire a candy floss cart then we can help.

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Photo Booths

Our Black Cab Photo Booth At Joe Macaris

15 February 2020

We recently provided a classic black cab photo booth for a birthday party. At the Joe Macari car dealership in London.

Now this isn’t just any old dealership. A quick look at his stock inventory will show a who’s who of classic high end cars. Lamborghini Countach, Jaguar E Type, Ferrari California, the list just goes on.

Really its like a petrol heads dream. He even has some quirky items like the Lamborghini LM002 SUV, of which only about 328 were ever produced. Or how about a Lambo tractor.

Classic Black Cab Photo Booth

We installed a black cab photo booth. After setting it all up, the boss told his car detailer to polish it up. He started and laughed to me that he had cleaned some of the worlds most exclusive cars, but that was his first ever London taxi.

Whilst on this job, a stunningly attractive Indian lady came up, accompanied by what looked like a throwback to a 1960’s groupie. Slicked back hair and the works. She looked at me and exclaimed, “Do you know what he did last week?”,

“No Idea” I Said,

“He took a porn star to a red carpet event!”

Laughing he said yes, she was off fake taxi dot com. His companion inquired as to what that might be, to be told that its a porn site. Where a taxi cab exactly like ours drives around London picking up beautiful women. Who just happen to want the driver to climb in the back with them and, well you can figure out the rest.

“Yes”, I said to break the tension, “I have been driving around all day and not been stopped once!”.

“Thats OK mate he replied, I will give you the number for my friend”

Lol, before I could comment his companion, replied “I can do better than that, I will give him my number and he can come and pick me up.”

Funny thing was he didn’t seem to be too impressed by that. As I walked away for a drink they were just firing the starting salvos of what promised to be an acrimonious argument.

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Photo Booths

Restoring Our Mini, Some Of The Little Bits

11 February 2020

Restoring our Mini is continuing. Most of the larger parts are with various experts to be sorted out. Meanwhile we have been tidying up some of the smaller pieces, which are necessary to put the icing on the cake and make our Mini something special.

Steering Column

The original column was a bit tatty, plus the steering boss was falling apart, and the steering wheel had seen better days.

We stripped the column down, shot blasted it then zinc galved and coated it with black anti rust topcoat.

The plastic column was replaced entirely as the old one had been drilled a number of times to insert screws to hold the broken indicator stalk.

The original boss was broken, well the plastic surround. We had intended upgrading the steering wheel to a Momo version, so needed a new boss as the hole pattern was different.

Our New Momo Steering Wheel, complete with uprated racing quality boss.

Whilst we were on the renewal war path, we also added some nifty billet alloy indicator stalk ends. These are made by a classic mini owner in limited quantities and really add a touch of class.

Finishing the steering column off was a new column drop bracket. This came from the range created by DSN retrosport. The quality as always is absolutely fabulous.

DSN Retrosport Steering Column Drop Bracket

Finishing our days work off, we managed to get the fuel tank coated with an anti rust top coat. Restoring our mini, has admittedly become a bigger job than we realised, but we are three parts through it now.

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Catering

Hot Chocolate Carts, A Touch Of Luxury

9 February 2020

One of our most popular lines is our range of luxury hot chocolate carts. Available on any of our range of carts and bars, the Alpine hut is the favourite in the winter months.

We have a wide range of carts, which get busy at different times of the year. Obviously things like frozen slush tend to be preferred in the middle of a hot summer. Mulled wine in the depths of winter.

We offer two varieties of hot chocolate carts. The ever popular Cadbury’s, and the more upmarket Charbonnel Et Walker. Both come with whipped cream, chocolate sprinkles, marshmallows and a range of syrup flavourings.

Cadbury’s needs no introduction, it has long been a favourite drink in the U.K. The other, Charbonnel, is made from actual chocolate flakes rather then cocoa powder. It is more akin to drinking molten chocolate, and is quite nice, though many do prefer the Cadbury’s version. Possibly more from habit than anything else.

Hot Chocolate Cart Hire — Our luxury chocolate carts, with a matching Belgian waffle cart.

Extra Options

We also offer a range of complimentary options to go with the hot chocolate carts. Ranging from Spanish Churros, to Belgian Waffles, all going down a treat.

This is the perfect winter warmer for weddings, parties and corporate events, we can even build a custom bar for corporate or exhibition use. Not bad for a drink that is reputed to have been consumed by the mayans around 500 B.C., although as sugar wasn’t available then, it is said to have been an exceptionally bitter drink. Cocoa was even used as a currency at one point, and it was considered an ill omen for someone of low status to even drink it.

Around 1828 a Dutchman invented a machine that separated the cocoa butter from the seeds, this gave rise to chocolate powder and was the first incarnation of what we drink now.

Some countries such as Italy have a particularly thick version called cioccolata calda, whilst the Americans have a thin watery version.

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Fun Story, Photo Booths

Classic Mini Restoration

30 January 2020

Continuing our restoration we have just finished the front subframe. That’s the classic Mini version of a chassis, they have one front and one back. The front one here carries the engine, front braking system and front wheels.

This one was a bit worse for wear than the rear frame. Necessitating replacing the entire metal structure with a new one. We took the opportunity whilst doing this to replace and upgrade the braking system, drive hubs and brake pipes.

We replaced the entire front subframe to give us a firm base to start from.

We also made the decision to go back to solid mounts on the front subframe and semi solid on the tower mounts. Although it is meant to slightly worsen the ride quality, it is supposed to vastly improve the handling, and lets face it, the best part of a classic Mini is the ability to throw it around corners, fast.

We also decided that we were going to replace the brake discs with some uprated versions. After much research settled on some Red Calipers from KAD. To be honest this was as much for the looks as anything else. They are absolutely stunning in anodized red, we also added vented and grooved discs, and lightweight alloy drive hubs for a little weight saving.

Braking System

We also added the obligatory Goodridge braided brake pipes. Fully adjustable tie bars and bottom control arms to allow the suspension to be set up to perfection.

Specialist Components LIghtweight Tower Bolts

The late great Colin Chapman once said, give a car more power and its faster on the straights, make a car lighter and its faster everywhere. To this aim, we swapped the tower bolts for lightweight alloy alternatives. Another product from Specialist Components, a little weight saving along with stunning looks.

Its meant to be a classic mini restoration, but the aim is to use modern components to make it better than original.

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Event Planning, Fun Story, Photo Booths

Beginning Jaspers Restoration

22 January 2020

The engine out of our mini is in bits, spread around a number of specialist engine builders (MED and Southam Mini Centre), to be tuned up and the power output cranked up a bit. Although Jaspers restoration was meant to be a quick tidy up, its ended up becoming a complete makeover.

The bodyshell is in the blasters to be stripped of paint. So we have turned our attention to the rear subframe, the first of the parts we are refurbing in house.

It was a bit grotty to start with, but mainly surface rust so nothing to major to put right.

The swing arms were blasted, coated with cold galvanizing spray then topcoated with a Rustbusters product. The bushes and bearings were changed, new pins fitted, Goodrich brake lines, alloy brake drums, and specialist components rear hub assemblies fitted, along with DSN retrosport alloy brake plates.

Things like the handbrake quadrants are really for looks rather than performance, but hey if you are going to do it, might as well look the part.

To finish the subframes we fitted alloy trunnions, adjustable swing arm brackets, and seam sealed the subframe to prevent water ingress. Once the subframes are fitted we have some Bilt Humber anti rust wax, but we don’t want to coat the parts yet as it will make a mess fitting them.

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Event Planning, Fun Story, Photo Booths

Jasper’s New Clothes

21 January 2020

Jasper is our British Racing Green Classic Mini photo booth. One of our most popular booths he has travelled the highways and byways of our green and pleasant land. Dispensing lashings of fun and weddings and corporate events. This will be a running tale of Jasper’s new clothes, also known as a full restoration.

After much hard work it was felt that Jasper was starting to look a little frayed around the edges. The decision was taken to patch up some of the rust that is starting to appear. Then to paint the engine and engine bay to spruce him up a bit.

However, like many of the best laid plans, once we started stripping him down, this suddenly morphed into a complete nut and bolt restoration. Similarly it was felt that a little extra power would be nice on the engine front. Which rapidly became a full engine rebuild with numerous upgrades to increase the power and drivability.

Currently Jasper is in bits, (and we mean in bits, there isn’t any 2 pieces still connected together). Pictured below he is being carried into the shotblasters. He is going to be taken back to bare metal before the new body panels are fitted.

Jasper Being Carried Into The Shotblasters

Over the next few months we will post regular updates to keep you informed of how he is coming along. At the minute the shell is in being blasted, the engine parts are at various experts getting work done. The sub frames are at our base being rebuilt by us.

All in all we are sure Jasper’s new clothes will result in a stunning example of this classic British car.

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General

Auschwitz, Man Is Capable Of Wonderful Dreams

27 March 2019

But Also Dark Nightmares.

For a number of years I would choose a family holiday around where my young daughter wanted to visit. Usually they would revolve around some school project she was involved with. When studying the Romans, we ended up in Rome, during an art project, Barcelona to visit Anton Gaudi’s work.

It rolled around to them doing a project about the holocaust, during which she learnt about Anne Franks. That year we took her to Amsterdam, one of my favourite cities, to visit the Anne Franks house. I remember calling there on honeymoon, at the time it was basically the original house. When we called this time it had been built into a museum. As we were exiting, we noticed a display on the wall concerning the Nazi death camp at Auschwitz. She turned to me and asked if I would take her there.

As soon as we had some time spare, I arranged a few days in Krakow, and booked a days excursion to Auschwitz. Krakow was lovely, and the people really friendly. On the morning we were due to visit the camp, I had arranged a private taxi and driver so that we could follow our own itinerary, and not be rushed about.

Into Auschwitz – Birkenau

The camp itself was a brooding intense place. The one stand out memory was the quiet. Not from the visitors who were being properly respectful. But from the lack of any of natures usual chorus. We didn’t hear any birdsong, not a tweet or chirp of an insect. It was as if nature itself sensed the enormity of what had transpired at that terrible place and either avoided it, or refused to give song within its boundaries.

Some of the rooms had been made into exhibits. These alone were heartbreaking. A room filled to the ceiling of children’s shoes. Another filled with false legs. When you think what proportion of the general population had false legs, you realised how many people they had to kill to fill a large room with them.

Mother, Father and Child

We took many pictures there, and couldn’t look at a lot of them until much later. The picture below was to my mind the most poignant. It was placed at the end of the railway tracks leading onto the camp. Only small, about perhaps 10 inches high, with nothing to say who had placed it there or what it represented. I didn’t really understand what it was until much later. Looking at it one day, I suddenly realised it was a mother and father holding a child’s hands between them. The camp guide had told us that the railway siding had been where the inmates would have been together as a family for the last time. Before they were segregated and some sent to the gas chambers, others to be worked to death.

A Small Symbol Of Two Parents Holding A Child’s Hands

I think that visiting Auschwitz is something everyone should try and undertake at least once during their lifetime. To see just what horrors mankind is capable of inflicting upon itself.

The plaque below sums up the unimaginable numbers involved in the whole process. Evidently the small stones placed on it are a Jewish tradition. An explanation of this can be found here.

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